The Trump Presidency Timeline
Documenting the chaos since day one. 1615 entries and counting.
lawlessness
epstein transparency: pam bondi's vanishing act
Pam Bondi: Now you see her, now you don't. Transparency? What's that?
In a shocking turn of events that absolutely no one saw coming, the Trump administration seems to have misplaced its moral compass and any notion of transparency. Senators Jeff Merkley and Ben Ray Luján, apparently still under the impression that laws matter, are blocking Senate nominations until Attorney General Pam Bondi decides to stop playing hide-and-seek with Epstein's files. Yes, because nothing screams 'justice for victims' like an administration that can't even manage a simple briefing. But sure, let's pretend this isn't a colossal middle finger to 'equal justice under the law'.
As Bondi and the DOJ ghost Congress, the White House's silence is deafening. Merkley and Luján are demanding full disclosure, but in Trump's America, it seems some secrets are meant to be buried right alongside any political accountability. Until then, the Senate's civilian nominations will sit in limbo, proving once again that lawlessness is the only constant in this administration. But hey, at least they're consistent!
As Bondi and the DOJ ghost Congress, the White House's silence is deafening. Merkley and Luján are demanding full disclosure, but in Trump's America, it seems some secrets are meant to be buried right alongside any political accountability. Until then, the Senate's civilian nominations will sit in limbo, proving once again that lawlessness is the only constant in this administration. But hey, at least they're consistent!
Source: theguardian.com
#lawlessness#corruption
anti immigration
trump's all-you-can-ban buffet
Trump's travel ban: because nothing says 'welcome' like a closed door.
In his never-ending quest to redefine 'the land of the free,' Donald Trump has signed yet another proclamation, further restricting foreign nationals from entering the United States. This time, Burkina Faso, Mali, Niger, South Sudan, and Syria are the lucky winners of Trump's travel ban lottery, along with anyone holding Palestinian Authority-issued travel documents. Because nothing says 'national security' quite like making sure people from already war-torn countries can't flee to safety in America.
The White House insists these measures are 'necessary' to prevent potential threats after an isolated incident involving an Afghan national who—shockingly—had actually been vetted and granted asylum. In other words, blame one person and punish thousands. Sounds fair, right? Meanwhile, Syria's inclusion comes hot on the heels of a cordial White House visit from their president. So, after a nice chat with a country, the best way to show friendship is apparently to ban their citizens. Diplomacy, Trump-style.
With partial restrictions slapped on another 15 countries, we can only assume Trump's goal is to see just how small he can make the list of countries not banned from the U.S. But sure, let's always remember: it's all about keeping Americans safe, one travel ban at a time.
The White House insists these measures are 'necessary' to prevent potential threats after an isolated incident involving an Afghan national who—shockingly—had actually been vetted and granted asylum. In other words, blame one person and punish thousands. Sounds fair, right? Meanwhile, Syria's inclusion comes hot on the heels of a cordial White House visit from their president. So, after a nice chat with a country, the best way to show friendship is apparently to ban their citizens. Diplomacy, Trump-style.
With partial restrictions slapped on another 15 countries, we can only assume Trump's goal is to see just how small he can make the list of countries not banned from the U.S. But sure, let's always remember: it's all about keeping Americans safe, one travel ban at a time.
Source: theguardian.com
#anti-immigration#fascism
forever grifting
big tech's new mission: bankrupt american families
Ah, the digital fortresses of Big Tech—where the profits are private, and the electricity bills are public.
What a delightful surprise! Senators Elizabeth Warren, Chris Van Hollen, and Richard Blumenthal have decided to investigate whether Silicon Valley's prized data centers are responsible for making your electricity bills go the way of Tesla stock—sky-high. Because, of course, nothing says "caring about the average American" like offloading your utility costs onto them, just as you rake in those sweet state and local tax benefits and play the 'trade secrets' card to keep everyone blissfully ignorant.
In a display of altruism worthy of a soap opera, Big Tech's giants are asked why bills are rising by as much as 267% in areas blessed with the presence of their data centers. Meanwhile, utility companies are giddily expanding infrastructure on the backs of the American taxpayer. But sure, data centers are totally not responsible for powering hundreds of thousands of homes without a hitch while simultaneously soaking up electricity like it's Black Friday. Bravo, tech overlords—your commitment to both secrecy and environmental destruction is truly unparalleled.
In a display of altruism worthy of a soap opera, Big Tech's giants are asked why bills are rising by as much as 267% in areas blessed with the presence of their data centers. Meanwhile, utility companies are giddily expanding infrastructure on the backs of the American taxpayer. But sure, data centers are totally not responsible for powering hundreds of thousands of homes without a hitch while simultaneously soaking up electricity like it's Black Friday. Bravo, tech overlords—your commitment to both secrecy and environmental destruction is truly unparalleled.
Source: theguardian.com
#forever-grifting#imperialism
imperialism
pentagon perfects hide-and-seek with caribbean strike footage
Pete Hegseth: master of the 'nothing to see here' diplomacy.
In a shocking turn of events, the Pentagon has decided to keep the full video of a Caribbean strike under wraps. Because nothing screams 'transparency' like hiding footage of an operation where US forces allegedly turned a boat into a floating bonfire and its passengers into collateral damage. Pete Hegseth assures us this is all in line with 'longstanding department policy,' a.k.a. we'll show you what we want, when we want.
Meanwhile, Marco Rubio and Lindsey Graham are doubling down on their roles as Trump’s military cheerleaders, refusing to acknowledge any pesky 'war crime' allegations. After all, in Trump’s America, blowing up boats is the new diplomacy. As for the legalities, Rand Paul is questioning the morality of this floating game of Battleship, while Don Bacon teeters on the edge of logic, asking for congressional approval over a campaign so reckless it makes a toddler with a hammer look responsible. But sure, let's keep that video under wraps—wouldn't want the truth to spoil the fun.
Meanwhile, Marco Rubio and Lindsey Graham are doubling down on their roles as Trump’s military cheerleaders, refusing to acknowledge any pesky 'war crime' allegations. After all, in Trump’s America, blowing up boats is the new diplomacy. As for the legalities, Rand Paul is questioning the morality of this floating game of Battleship, while Don Bacon teeters on the edge of logic, asking for congressional approval over a campaign so reckless it makes a toddler with a hammer look responsible. But sure, let's keep that video under wraps—wouldn't want the truth to spoil the fun.
Source: theguardian.com
#imperialism#national-security
retribution
trump's omnipotence delusion
When omnipotence meets incompetence: The Trump-Wiles duo in action.
Apparently, Donald Trump has now fully embraced his role as a benevolent overlord with the help of his chief enabler, Susie Wiles, who assures us there's literally nothing he can't do as president. And by 'nothing,' she means everything from bending the Constitution to what can only be described as a score-settling revenge tour. High-functioning alcoholic personality or not, Trump's sobriety evidently hasn't prevented him from behaving like a textbook despot-in-training.
Meanwhile, Wiles, in a brilliant move of public relations strategy, acknowledges Trump's 'opportunity-driven' retribution against political adversaries, saying, 'Who would blame him?' Well, Susie, maybe anyone who still values principles like justice and democracy. Of course, in the grand tradition of Trump-era politics, Wiles attempted damage control by accusing Vanity Fair of a hit piece, because nothing says credible leadership like blaming the media for your own candid admissions.
And let's not forget the illustrious cast of characters aiding Trump in this saga. Elon Musk, the unofficial government efficiency Czar, is outdoing himself with his USAID demolition derby, while Pam Bondi continues to fumble the Epstein files like they're a hot potato. Meanwhile, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., a vaccine skeptic in charge of health, and JD Vance, a conspiracy theorist turned vice president, round out this world-class cabinet that supposedly tackles the deep state but seems better suited for a circus.
Meanwhile, Wiles, in a brilliant move of public relations strategy, acknowledges Trump's 'opportunity-driven' retribution against political adversaries, saying, 'Who would blame him?' Well, Susie, maybe anyone who still values principles like justice and democracy. Of course, in the grand tradition of Trump-era politics, Wiles attempted damage control by accusing Vanity Fair of a hit piece, because nothing says credible leadership like blaming the media for your own candid admissions.
And let's not forget the illustrious cast of characters aiding Trump in this saga. Elon Musk, the unofficial government efficiency Czar, is outdoing himself with his USAID demolition derby, while Pam Bondi continues to fumble the Epstein files like they're a hot potato. Meanwhile, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., a vaccine skeptic in charge of health, and JD Vance, a conspiracy theorist turned vice president, round out this world-class cabinet that supposedly tackles the deep state but seems better suited for a circus.
Source: theguardian.com
#fascism#lawlessness#retribution
fascism
trump vs. bbc: grievance olympics
Trump, on a mission to liberate the UK from the 'tyranny' of the BBC.
In a move that screams 'UK invasion,' Donald Trump has decided to smash through national boundaries and sue the BBC for a cool $10 billion over their audacity to splice his insurrection-inspiring speech. Because nothing says 'grievance politics with a purpose' quite like pretending the BBC is a global menace to democracy, rather than, you know, January 6th itself.
While the BBC might be scratching its head over another Trump temper tantrum, their response is a masterclass in British resolve: no apologies to White House bullying. Meanwhile, Sir Keir Starmer appears to be keeping mum, probably too busy dealing with the aftermath of Trump’s latest legal conquest strategy. In other words, Trump is flexing his litigation muscles to cow media outlets into submission—because nothing says 'supreme leader' like suing your way through criticism.
But sure, let's pretend this isn't just part of his larger campaign to stifle dissent and spread American-style media intimidation across the pond.
While the BBC might be scratching its head over another Trump temper tantrum, their response is a masterclass in British resolve: no apologies to White House bullying. Meanwhile, Sir Keir Starmer appears to be keeping mum, probably too busy dealing with the aftermath of Trump’s latest legal conquest strategy. In other words, Trump is flexing his litigation muscles to cow media outlets into submission—because nothing says 'supreme leader' like suing your way through criticism.
But sure, let's pretend this isn't just part of his larger campaign to stifle dissent and spread American-style media intimidation across the pond.
Source: theguardian.com
#fascism#killing-democracy
killing democracy
trump vs bbc: the ultimate snowflake showdown
Donald Trump, master negotiator, in his natural habitat: suing the media for reporting on his own words.
In the latest episode of 'Trump's World: Lawsuit Edition,' Donald Trump is taking on the BBC with a hefty $10 billion lawsuit. The former president claims that the broadcaster 'intentionally, maliciously, and deceptively' edited his January 6th speech, because who wouldn't want to risk it all on creative editing of a speech everyone can already watch on YouTube? The BBC, not one to back down from blustering billionaires, has vowed to defend itself, saying, 'We are not going to make further comment on ongoing legal proceedings,' which is British for bring it on. In other words, get ready for the trial of the century where facts meet fiction and reality TV meets actual reality.
Source: theguardian.com
#killing-democracy#lawlessness
retribution
susie wiles disputes 'creative storytelling' in vanity fair
Susie Wiles: Mastering 'context' one X post at a time
In a move nobody saw coming, Trump's Chief of Staff, Susie Wiles, has taken to X (because calling it Twitter would be too factual) to dispute a Vanity Fair article painting the administration as a Shakespearean farce starring Trump, Musk, and Vance. Wiles, who apparently believes the best way to handle a 'hit piece' is to highlight it for the masses, insists the article left out the 'significant context' that would surely clear up any misconceptions about Trump's alleged 'alcoholic's personality' and the administration's penchant for retribution. Wiles' pearls of wisdom on Musk's government efficiency rampage and her popsci analysis of big personalities are sure to be quoted in future political science textbooks—not.
Source: bbc.com
#retribution
imperialism
trump's cannabis reform: a joint venture for capitalism
Trump: Turning cannabis reform into a business high, not a social justice win.
Trump has taken a massive hit from the reality bong and is very strongly considering rescheduling cannabis from Schedule I to III, because nothing screams progress like putting weed in the same category as codeine. In other words, welcome to Trump's America where cannabis is totally okay as long as the billion-dollar industry can grab some tax breaks and investors can swim in green cash, not green leaves.
But don't put away those protest signs just yet. While cannabis stocks are getting high, the criminal justice system remains a sticky situation—people are still locked up for trafficking while Trump's cronies puff away on profits. Remember, rescheduling isn't decriminalizing. The 'war on drugs' may be getting a facelift, but it's still business as usual abroad, where Trump is ready to bomb anyone who dares drop a dime bag near U.S. borders. Hyper-commercialization at home, imperialism abroad—it's the Trump way.
But don't put away those protest signs just yet. While cannabis stocks are getting high, the criminal justice system remains a sticky situation—people are still locked up for trafficking while Trump's cronies puff away on profits. Remember, rescheduling isn't decriminalizing. The 'war on drugs' may be getting a facelift, but it's still business as usual abroad, where Trump is ready to bomb anyone who dares drop a dime bag near U.S. borders. Hyper-commercialization at home, imperialism abroad—it's the Trump way.
Source: theguardian.com
#imperialism#forever-grifting
killing democracy
justice department redefines 'justice' for students
Harmeet Dhillon, now leading the charge in redefining 'civil rights', because who needs experience when you have ideology?
In a bold reinterpretation of 'civil rights', the Trump administration's Justice Department has turned its focus away from trivial matters like protecting students from abuse and discrimination, and toward the far more pressing issue of defending white people against imagined bias. Harmeet Dhillon, the new leader of the civil rights division, is apparently ensuring that only the 'right' civil liberties are defended. The mass exodus of career staffers from the educational opportunities section—a group that once dealt with the real-world impacts of racial discrimination and seclusion—seems like a novel approach to department efficiency. After all, when there are no lawyers left to investigate abuses, it certainly cuts down on government overhead. In other words, under Trump's justifiably 'efficient' leadership, the best way to handle civil rights violations is to simply stop investigating them. But sure, let's call this a re-prioritization.
Source: theguardian.com
#killing-democracy#fascism
racism
smiling through the chaos: mamdani's grin tested
Zohran Mamdani: Smiling in the face of chaos, because why let the absurdity get you down?
Arwa Mahdawi embarked on a month-long scientific exploration, attempting to mimic Zohran Mamdani’s unflappable grin—because nothing says 'serious journalism' like a quest for the perfect perma-smile. After all, what better way to combat racism and political vitriol than with a smile that makes your enemies wonder if you’ve got a secret stash of happy pills? But sure, let’s call it an act of resistance, in a world where being brown and smiling is apparently subversive.
In her brave experiment, Mahdawi discovered that constant grinning might keep your heart rate in check, even if it results in cheek cramps and photos that scream 'I’m smiling because I have to.' So, while Mamdani continues to smile his way through baseless citizenship investigations and ridiculous labels, Mahdawi will return to her usual expression—presumably one of bemused disbelief at the state of the world.
In her brave experiment, Mahdawi discovered that constant grinning might keep your heart rate in check, even if it results in cheek cramps and photos that scream 'I’m smiling because I have to.' So, while Mamdani continues to smile his way through baseless citizenship investigations and ridiculous labels, Mahdawi will return to her usual expression—presumably one of bemused disbelief at the state of the world.
Source: theguardian.com
#racism
full stupid
the grinch who sold christmas
Trump explains the virtues of austerity while dressed as Santa's least favorite elf.
In the latest episode of The Trump Show, the former president took to rural Pennsylvania to deliver what can only be described as a 'Christmas speech' if the criteria is 'mention Christmas once and then bludgeon the crowd with delusions.' Trump boasted that under his presidency, 'everybody's saying merry Christmas' again, because nothing says festive cheer like a billionaire instructing struggling families to buy fewer toys. Yes, folks, 37 pencils are apparently a luxury—consider this your lesson in fiscal responsibility from a man with a crypto wallet the size of Mount Everest.
But sure, let's talk affordability: Trump rambled about stock market gains as if most Americans even have a stock portfolio to cry into. He then veered off into his usual routine—attacking Ilhan Omar, ridiculing windmills, and calling Joe Biden a 'son of a bitch.' Because nothing says Merry Christmas like a touch of xenophobia and misogyny. Even the MAGA faithful are starting to look for the exit, as evidenced by Miami voters flipping the script on Trump-endorsed candidates and Indiana Republicans rejecting his redistricting bullying. Looks like Trump won’t be stealing Christmas; Christmas might just steal what little he has left.
But sure, let's talk affordability: Trump rambled about stock market gains as if most Americans even have a stock portfolio to cry into. He then veered off into his usual routine—attacking Ilhan Omar, ridiculing windmills, and calling Joe Biden a 'son of a bitch.' Because nothing says Merry Christmas like a touch of xenophobia and misogyny. Even the MAGA faithful are starting to look for the exit, as evidenced by Miami voters flipping the script on Trump-endorsed candidates and Indiana Republicans rejecting his redistricting bullying. Looks like Trump won’t be stealing Christmas; Christmas might just steal what little he has left.
Source: theguardian.com
#full-stupid#forever-grifting
anti immigration
republicans rediscover compassion, just kidding
Nothing screams 'land of the free' like stranding a refugee child in a foreign land. Thanks, Trump!
Republicans are delighting us all with their newfound division over Afghan immigration policy, sparked by the 'oh-so-unexpected' shooting incident involving an Afghan national and a National Guard member. In other words, a tragic event has finally turned into the latest political football for the GOP. While Senator Thom Tillis cautions against a "knee-jerk reaction," Trump is busy keeping his promise to "launch the largest deportation effort in American history." Because nothing says 'American values' like deporting those who risked their lives for our troops. Meanwhile, Senator Susan Collins is fretting over Afghan interpreters and cooks, suggesting that maybe we should actually consider vetting them properly—an idea apparently lost in the Biden bashing. But sure, let's keep up the great work of splitting the party while keeping our immigration 'policy' as clear as mud.
Source: npr.org
#anti-immigration#killing-democracy
leopards ate my face
maga's civil war: trump's legacy crumbling?
Trump's cabinet: where future successors gather to plot their inevitable betrayals and reality TV show spinoffs.
Ah, the MAGA movement—once a unified bastion of undying loyalty to its Supreme Leader, now facing a delightful existential crisis. President Trump has peered into his glittering cabinet room and declared that his successor is 'probably sitting at this table'. But don't worry, it's totally not going to be him, despite the chants of 'four more years' echoing through his rallies—because nothing screams 'democratic values' like clinging to power against constitutional limits. In a plot twist that could rival a soap opera, this MAGA fairytale is showing cracks, with infighting and defections reminiscent of a high school drama club. Marjorie Taylor Greene has already bolted, accusing Trump of losing touch with reality—because who would have seen that coming? JD Vance, the Silicon Valley libertarians' darling, and Marco Rubio, Trump's Secretary of State, are already jockeying for position, promising a spectacle as entertaining as a circus fire. The best part? Trump's very own movement might be the reason his legacy turns to ash. What a time to be alive!
Source: bbc.com
#leopards-ate-my-face#killing-democracy
trade war
ford's electric dreams hit a trump-sized roadblock
Ford waves goodbye to electric dreams, thank Trump.
Ford is taking a measly $19.5 billion hit as it bravely retreats from the realm of electric vehicles, thanks to the Trump administration's genius policies. Because nothing says 'forward-thinking' like kneecapping EV demand and loosening tailpipe emissions rules. In other words, Ford is pulling the plug on models like the F-150 Lightning to embrace hybrids and gas guzzlers once again—because, evidently, the future is in the rearview mirror.
And let's not forget the poetic slaughter of Ford's next-gen EV lineup, with the T3 truck and electric commercial vans biting the dust. But don't worry, Ford plans to pivot towards more 'affordable' EVs by 2027. Who knew backpedaling could be this lucrative, right? Ford's new strategy? Invest in higher-returning areas—like the crumbling gas-powered future Trump seems hell-bent on resurrecting. Bravo, democracy, you've outdone yourself this time.
Source: theguardian.com
#trade-war#killing-democracy
fascism
european le pen pals: austerity chic
Marine Le Pen and AfD: Europe's new champions of selective social justice—or, you know, the usual suspects.
As Europe braces for a 'decisive' transformation, the Democrats are still in shock therapy after the Trump comeback—because who needs strategy when you have disbelief? Meanwhile, the EU's solution to its existential crises? Austerity, of course! In other words, let's cut pensions and public services so the working class can really feel the love.
With Marine Le Pen and Germany’s AfD leading in the polls thanks to their 'welfare chauvinism' tactics—essentially, promising welfare only to 'the right' kind of citizens—mainstream parties are scratching their heads. But sure, don't tax the rich or invest in public goods. That might actually help people. Instead, let's shower the less well-off with budget cuts and call it empowerment!
With Marine Le Pen and Germany’s AfD leading in the polls thanks to their 'welfare chauvinism' tactics—essentially, promising welfare only to 'the right' kind of citizens—mainstream parties are scratching their heads. But sure, don't tax the rich or invest in public goods. That might actually help people. Instead, let's shower the less well-off with budget cuts and call it empowerment!
Source: theguardian.com
#fascism
forever grifting
trump's touching tribute: rob reiner had tds
Rob Reiner speaks at an event, blissfully unaware that his future eulogy would be penned by the prolific wordsmith, Donald Trump.
In a heartwarming display of class and empathy, Trump took to Truth Social to express his condolences for the late Rob Reiner by diagnosing him posthumously with Trump Derangement Syndrome. Because nothing spells out a 'Golden Age of America' like dragging a grieving family through the mud. Reiner, a vocal critic of Trump, was described as having a 'raging obsession,' which, in other words, means he dared to disagree with the infallible leader of the free world. Even Marjorie Taylor Greene, Trump's former ally, found the remarks distasteful, but sure, let's make it about TDS.
Source: npr.org
#forever-grifting#killing-democracy
unconstitutional
supreme court's tiktok ban: because censorship is patriotic now
Supreme Court Justices seen contemplating their next move in the never-ending game of 'Who Needs the First Amendment Anyway?'
Ah, the US Supreme Court, always finding new ways to dazzle us with their breathtaking commitment to freedom of speech—by unanimously upholding a TikTok ban straight out of a fascist playbook. Apparently, nothing screams 'national security' like nuking a social media platform because some lawmakers got their knickers in a twist over videos of Gaza airstrikes. Let's all pretend that banning a foreign media app is not something usually done by repressive regimes.
But sure, let's give the government
But sure, let's give the government
Source: theguardian.com
#unconstitutional#killing-democracy
imperialism
trump brings back gunboat diplomacy, because why not?
Trump's version of foreign policy: When in doubt, send in the fleet.
In a move that would make Theodore Roosevelt proud, Donald Trump is reviving the art of gunboat diplomacy in Venezuela. With a military ensemble large enough to make a Broadway show jealous, Trump has decided that the best way to stem the flow of drugs is to deploy an aircraft carrier, destroyers, cruisers, and a special forces support ship to the Caribbean Sea. Because nothing says 'stop drugs' like a full-fledged naval invasion, right? Meanwhile, Pam Bondi is playing the role of the administration's PR wizard, claiming the seizure of an oil tanker is somehow linked to 'illicit oil shipping networks' and foreign terrorists. Sure, Pam, whatever you say. In other words, Trump's handling of Venezuela is about as clear as mud, but hey, who needs clarity when you have military might and a penchant for drama? As for Congress and the OAS, they're left scrambling to figure out how to reel in this 21st-century imperialist spectacle before it spirals into a full South American quagmire. But let's be real, who needs peace and diplomacy when you can just wave some big guns around?
Source: theguardian.com
#imperialism#national-security
imperialism
another day, another deadly misadventure in syria
Syria's new president: redefining 'progress' one ISIS surprise at a time.
Ah, Syria, where the new president who once flirted with Al-Qaeda now extends heartfelt condolences to President Trump over a deadly attack on U.S. forces. Because nothing says 'fresh leadership' like a surprise visit from ISIS at your doorstep. In other words, the Middle East remains as stable as a Jenga tower in an earthquake.
Meanwhile, Trump, ever the man of few coherent words, has threatened 'serious consequences' without, of course, bothering with details. After all, why spoil the suspense when dealing with international crises? And just like clockwork, American troops are still playing whack-a-mole with ISIS and protecting oil installations because, priorities!
In a land where dictators and foreign interventions are as common as kebabs, Syria's president is trying to reassert control over a nation that seems to have not gotten the memo about moving on from decades of conflict. But sure, a few more arrests ought to do the trick.
Meanwhile, Trump, ever the man of few coherent words, has threatened 'serious consequences' without, of course, bothering with details. After all, why spoil the suspense when dealing with international crises? And just like clockwork, American troops are still playing whack-a-mole with ISIS and protecting oil installations because, priorities!
In a land where dictators and foreign interventions are as common as kebabs, Syria's president is trying to reassert control over a nation that seems to have not gotten the memo about moving on from decades of conflict. But sure, a few more arrests ought to do the trick.
Source: npr.org
#imperialism#national-security