The Trump Presidency Timeline
Documenting the chaos since day one. 3300 entries and counting.
trump’s iran war needs cash, plans, and authorization; gets none
Lisa Murkowski, briefly remembering Congress is supposed to declare wars, not just fund the merchandising.
Republican senators have discovered a shocking new concept: if President Trump wants tens of billions more dollars for his Iran adventure, he might actually have to ask Congress to, you know, authorize the war. The conflict is now at day 75 of what Trump promised would be a four-to-five week joyride, Iran is choking the Strait of Hormuz, fuel prices are spiking, and the White House’s grand strategy appears to be: insist hostilities are over while U.S. forces keep getting shot at.
Lisa Murkowski, Susan Collins, and Rand Paul briefly emerged from the Senate’s Witness Protection Program to vote with Democrats on a War Powers resolution telling Trump to stop playing Commander-in-God and get authorization or get out. Murkowski even pointed out the awkward detail that the administration claims hostilities have ended, which would neatly erase any excuse for keeping troops in danger without Congress signing off. Meanwhile, House Republicans keep barely blocking similar efforts, proving that nothing unites the party like refusing to do its constitutional job.
Out in the real world, the Navy is warning it’ll have to start cutting training, operations, and personnel by July because the Iran war, charmingly branded Operation Epic Fury, wasn’t even budgeted for. At the same time, Central Command quietly took its civilian-harm reduction office from ten people to one just months after a U.S. strike on an Iranian school. So yes, the administration is burning through cash it doesn’t have on a war it hasn’t authorized, while dismantling the tiny bit of infrastructure meant to stop it from killing kids. But don’t worry, Trump says Xi Jinping promised not to ship weapons to Iran, and if there’s one thing you can bank on in this administration, it’s totally unverifiable promises from authoritarian pals.
Source: thehill.com
supreme court briefly remembers what 'standing' is

The Supreme Court building pauses from dismantling rights to briefly remember that the FDA exists and the mail is not a theocracy.
The Supreme Court, having spent the last few years lighting reproductive rights on fire, has now graciously agreed to pour a thimble of water on the blaze. In a 7-2 shadow-docket special, the justices said mifepristone can keep being mailed nationwide, at least until they find a more procedurally convenient way to torture pregnant people. Louisiana’s big legal theory was essentially: "We banned abortion here, so obviously we get to control the mail for the entire country." Even this court had to squint and say, yeah, that’s not how standing works.
Clarence Thomas and Sam Alito, naturally, dissented from reality. Thomas declared that mailing abortion pills is a "criminal enterprise" and tried to resurrect the 1873 Comstock Act, because nothing screams "modern constitutional jurisprudence" like dusting off Victorian anti-smut laws to control your uterus. Alito whined that keeping mifepristone available by mail "undermines" Dobbs, as if the real constitutional injury is that women haven’t suffered quite enough yet under his magnum opus.
Meanwhile, the Biden administration chose the bold strategy of… not responding to a lawsuit against its own FDA, leaving drug manufacturers and former FDA officials to do the grown-up work. The same Christian nationalist law shop, Alliance Defending Freedom, is once again trying to let a single red state override federal drug regulation for everyone, because why stop at abortion when you can blow up the entire pharmaceutical approval system? The Court punted the case back to the Fifth Circuit clown car, so everyone can look forward to Round Two: Now With Even More Theocracy, in a future term.
For now, medication abortion — which accounts for about two-thirds of abortions and has been safely used for decades — survives another trip through the Republican pain machine. Providers are already planning backup regimens in case the justices change their minds later, because when your healthcare depends on a court that misses its own deadlines while quoting 19th-century obscenity laws, "temporary" is the best you’re allowed to hope for.
Source: theguardian.com
billionaire fraud charges vanish after he hires trump’s lawyer, purely by coincidence

Gautam Adani and the ghost of Lady Justice, reviewing a 100-slide pitch deck titled ‘What If We Just Don’t Prosecute Billionaires?’
The Department of Justice, that plucky little agency formerly known for prosecuting crime, has reportedly decided to drop fraud charges against Gautam Adani – Asia’s richest man – right after he hired Donald Trump’s personal lawyer, Robert Giuffra Jr. At a secret April meeting inside DOJ, Giuffra rolled in with a 100-slide presentation explaining why prosecutors supposedly had no case, and, as a helpful bonus, mentioned that Adani would invest $10bn in the US and create 15,000 jobs if the charges just happened to go away. Because when you’re totally innocent, you always sweeten your legal arguments with a multi-billion-dollar economic development package.
Prosecutors insisted the investment offer wouldn’t affect the outcome, but one senior DOJ official reportedly reacted warmly to the idea that justice might come bundled with a jobs program. This is the same case where Adani was accused of orchestrating $250m in bribes to Indian officials, lying to investors and banks to raise billions, and obstructing justice – conduct DOJ once described as major corruption at the expense of US investors. Now, post-Trump comeback and post-hiring-of-Trump’s-lawyer, that towering pile of alleged fraud appears to be melting away faster than ethics rules at Mar-a-Lago.
Adani, a close ally of Narendra Modi and the poster child for industrial-scale crony capitalism, has long faced accusations of favoritism, monopoly-building, and legal harassment of journalists who investigate his empire. Naturally, this makes him an ideal character in the Trump-era justice system, where powerful friends and well-connected attorneys can apparently turn a federal fraud indictment into a negotiation over how many jobs your get-out-of-jail-free card will create. Rule of law has now been rebranded as: how much can you invest, and do you have Trump’s guy on retainer?
Source: theguardian.com
trump discovers indentured servitude for lawyers

Perkins Coie: now apparently requiring a spine of steel and a constitutional law refresher just to keep the lights on under President Retribution.
Source: nytimes.com
border warlord retires to spend more time with his prostitutes

Acting Border Patrol chief Mike Banks explains that the real security threat is families seeking asylum, not, say, the guy allegedly funding the global sex trade while militarizing the Rio Grande.
Source: theguardian.com
taiwan prays for a rare trump miracle: shut up and do nothing

Taipei residents watch statecraft by slot machine: pull the lever and hope Trump doesn’t blurt out your extinction in a joint press conference.
Source: theguardian.com
trump’s fcc discovers it actually loves government speech control

Brendan Carr’s FCC, courageously standing up to the grave national threat of late-night jokes.
Once upon a time, Republicans swore the government had no business messing with what broadcasters put on the air. Ronald Reagan’s FCC chair Mark Fowler said there was “no room” for the agency to play national hall monitor for TV content. Fast-forward to 2026 and Brendan Carr, Trump’s FCC chair, proudly announces, “This isn’t Ronald Reagan’s F.C.C. — and that’s a good thing,” which is a fun way of saying: we’ve moved from deregulation to state-approved comedy.
Trump’s FCC has now warned late-night hosts that if they keep mocking the president and then dare to book political candidates, they’d better cough up “equal time” for the opponents or face retaliation. They’re even investigating The View on the same theory, so apparently the full might of the federal government is now deployed against Joy Behar. The legal hook is a dusty “equal opportunities” statute that was supposed to prevent broadcasters from rigging access to candidates, not to force Jimmy Kimmel to hand out participation trophies to whichever Republican just got roasted in his monologue.
Conservatives spent decades insisting the Fairness Doctrine was Soviet tyranny; Trumpworld has essentially rebuilt a pettier, dumber version of it, targeted not at fairness but at hurt presidential feelings. The old line was “government shouldn’t pick winners and losers in the marketplace of ideas.” The new line is: mock Trump on TV, and the FCC shows up with a ruler and a copy of the U.S. Code. It’s less a communications policy than a federally subsidized safe space for the most powerful man in the country.
Source: nytimes.com
trump doj tries to doxx trans kids, runs into this thing called a judge

The Justice Department, bravely protecting America from the grave national security threat of… teenagers getting puberty blockers prescribed by their doctors.
Trump’s Department of Justice, having apparently run out of actual crime, decided to go full surveillance state on trans kids’ medical records. They sent sweeping subpoenas to Rhode Island’s largest hospital for gender-affirming care, demanding birthdates, Social Security numbers, home addresses, intake forms, guardian authorizations – basically everything short of a GPS tracker for every trans child treated in the last five years. All under the noble banner of investigating ‘misbranding’ and ‘fraud,’ because nothing says careful law enforcement like using Texas prosecutors to hunt down patients in Rhode Island.
US district judge Mary McElroy took one look at this fishing expedition and hit the brakes, noting that while DOJ has “immense prosecutorial authority,” it has “proven unworthy of this trust at every point in this case.” That is a federal judge saying, as politely as possible, that the Trump administration’s law enforcers cannot be trusted not to abuse their power. She also pointed out the obvious: the administration has publicly smeared gender-affirming care for minors as “abuse,” ordered DOJ to wipe it out, and then “celebrated” when hospitals curtailed care under subpoena pressure. Totally normal behavior for a government that swears this is all just about pharma compliance, and not about building a handy list of trans kids and their parents to harass.
Meanwhile, at least seven other courts have already swatted down or narrowed similar subpoenas hurled at more than 20 doctors and hospitals, 11 families have launched a class-action suit to stop DOJ from grabbing their kids’ records, and NYU Langone just revealed it got its own grand jury subpoena from Texas for info on trans youth care. Major medical groups keep saying gender-affirming care is essential, evidence-based treatment; the Trump administration keeps responding by treating it like contraband and deploying federal prosecutors like morality police with subpoena printers. Call it what it is: not healthcare policy, but a federalized harassment campaign against trans kids dressed up as law enforcement.
Source: theguardian.com
seb gorka’s 16-page fanfic declares leftists the new isis

America’s counterterrorism czar, seen here pondering which paragraph should accuse liberals of being al-Qaida with pronouns.
Sebastian Gorka has finally unveiled his long-teased “life’s work” on counterterrorism, and it turns out the magnum opus is… a typo-riddled 16-page Trump valentine that treats intelligence assessments like fake news. The new U.S. counterterrorism strategy declares Latin American drug cartels the top threat, demotes Islamist militants to second place, and then pulls a full where’s Waldo on far-right extremism — the thing the FBI keeps saying is the leading domestic danger. Neo-Nazis and militias don’t even get a shout-out, but a relatively tiny slice of militant leftists is elevated to cosmic supervillain status, on par with al-Qaida.
What used to be a sober, bipartisan national security document is now a campaign brochure with classified letterhead. The strategy gushes over Trump’s greatness, recycles his conspiracy theories about a stolen election and an alleged genocide of Christians, and warns darkly about “alien cultures” threatening Western civilization. It even finds room to mention Biden seven times, just in case anyone forgot who the designated villain is. Actual data? That’s for losers and Democrats.
This is the logical sequel to Trump’s mass pardons for more than 1,500 Jan. 6 defendants, including people who assaulted police, all while Republicans pretended that focusing on far-right violence was an attack on “conservative organizing.” Now the White House has codified that delusion into national strategy, explicitly hunting for “violent leftist antifascists and anarchists” while pretending the guy who Googled Hitler and Nazis before a campus shooting is just a statistical rounding error. The message is clear: if you’re a right-wing extremist, you’re a misunderstood patriot; if you’re on the left, you’re the new ISIS.
Asked about the glaring holes and partisan tilt, the White House did what passes for accountability in Trump’s America: they sent a spokesperson to email a slogan about “crushing terrorist threats” and pointed reporters back to Gorka’s own glowing self-promo. America’s top counterterrorism document now functions less as a security roadmap and more as a loyalty test. Who needs evidence-based threat assessments when you can just criminalize your critics and call it strategy?
Source: propublica.org
south carolina gop discovers there are dumber ways to gerrymander

South Carolina Republicans bravely defend the sacred principle that their gerrymander is already perfect and further democracy reduction would be, regrettably, inefficient.
Massey’s big insight? South Carolina is already gerrymandered to the edge of structural authoritarianism, and trying to go from a 6–1 to a 7–0 GOP delegation might actually backfire. Not because dismantling Black representation is immoral or, say, a Voting Rights Act horror show – no, because it might be bad strategy. He warns that if they get “cute” with the maps, an energized Black electorate could turn that 7–0 fantasy into a 5–2 nightmare, and he really doesn’t want to live in a world where Hakeem Jeffries is speaker.
So Massey wraps his defense of the current gerrymander in folksy concern about "communities of interest" and how "most people in South Carolina think we’re freaking crazy," while carefully blaming a faceless "they" in Washington instead of Trump or GOP leadership. The throughline: yes, the Supreme Court just gutted protections against racist redistricting, yes, Republicans are racing to exploit it, and yes, even some of them think the coup on representative democracy should proceed at a slightly slower, more mathematically efficient pace. Bold new era of conscience: please don’t wreck democracy so sloppily you cost us seats.
Source: theguardian.com
secretary of transportation launches great american self-promo tour

America’s infrastructure plan, apparently: one SUV, nine kids, a GoPro, and a cabinet secretary auditioning for his next show.
Source: nytimes.com
drain the swamp? he built a luxury cesspool

Artist’s rendering of Trump’s Washington: a golden ballroom floating serenely atop an open sewer of donors, pardons, and defense contracts.
The kids, naturally, are in on the war profiteering package. Don Jr and Eric are investors in a drone company pitching Gulf states during a U.S. war with Iran, while Eric’s side hustle as “chief strategy adviser” to a robotics startup is rewarded with a $24m Pentagon contract. Jared Kushner is supposedly brokering Middle East peace while his firm quietly tries to raise $5bn from the Saudis—at the same time Mohammed bin Salman is nudging Trump to hit Iran harder. Even a former Bush ethics lawyer is openly saying the Trump clan may be the first presidential family to get rich off a war; the White House, naturally, denies everything with the enthusiasm of a teenager denying they’ve been vaping in the bathroom.
And then there’s the ballroom. Trump wants a $400m gilded monstrosity at the White House, funded by corporations and billionaires who just coincidentally keep getting policy treats afterward. Nearly $2bn has been vacuumed up for his “pet causes,” with 346 donors dropping at least $250k each—and over half of them or their industries receiving helpful regulatory or policy love. Palantir tosses $10m at the ballroom and angles for a juicy role in Trump’s $1.2tn “Golden Dome” missile defense fantasy. Elon Musk pours in more than $270m for Trump’s 2024 run and is rewarded with control of a slash-and-burn “department of government efficiency” while SpaceX slurps down billions in federal contracts. Larry Ellison bankrolls GOP causes, helps his son grab CBS/Paramount, makes the network friendlier to Trump, then watches Oracle land a big stake in TikTok thanks to a presidential pen.
Somewhere in this shimmering muck are the long-promised “Epstein files” Trump vowed to release, only made public despite him after a bipartisan push pried them loose. So no, the swamp wasn’t drained. It was deepened, wired for crypto, surrounded with missile defense contractors, and topped off with a $400m ballroom so the oligarchs can toast each other while democracy decomposes quietly in the corner.
Source: theguardian.com
trump promised 'the best economy' and delivered shrinkflation on aisle 5

Trump smiles confidently while Americans calculate whether they can afford both groceries and electricity this month.
Source: today.com
ai cage match: musk vs altman vs breathable air

Elon Musk and Sam Altman, bravely battling each other to decide which billionaire gets to privatize your power grid and your data first.
Source: theguardian.com
george washington, influencer for christian nationalism

George Washington kneels in the snow, praying that future presidents won’t use him as a prop for government-sponsored Christian nationalism. Prayer not answered.
Source: nytimes.com
biden waits for gop ‘epiphany’; gets full-blown cult instead

Joe Biden stares into the middle distance, waiting for the GOP’s epiphany like it’s a delayed Amtrak that’s actually been dismantled for parts by Trump’s second-term wrecking crew.
Democratic voters, who spent the Obama and early Biden years begging their leaders to compromise with a party actively trying to burn down democracy, have finally noticed the arson. Polls now show a solid majority of Democrats want their representatives to hold the line rather than play nice with President For-Life-In-His-Head. Even Hakeem Jeffries has quietly retired the Michelle Obama "go high" mantra and replaced it with "when they go low, we strike back"—a slogan that doubles as both a political strategy and an accurate description of every Trump speech.
Meanwhile, the party base is tossing out leadership-approved moderates in favor of people who run on platforms like "I will actually fight the fascists" instead of "I will seek common ground with the fascists." Candidates like Analilia Mejia in New Jersey and Graham Platner in Maine are bulldozing establishment favorites, while strategists openly admit that Biden and Obama badly misread a GOP that never had a "fever" to break—just a long-term project to dismantle multiracial democracy. Trump’s ideology now owns the party so completely that even his knockoffs struggle to imitate the original grift.
Sen. Chris Murphy helpfully lays out the stakes: Democrats can’t just "win" in 2026 or 2028, do a couple of bipartisan photo ops, and call it a day while Trumpism keeps rewriting the rules of the system. Either they actually follow through on "unrig the economy and unrig the democracy" or we all keep living in the sequel to 2016 that never ends. The GOP had its epiphany a long time ago: authoritarian power works when your opponents are still busy asking if Mitch McConnell wants to form a working group.
Source: nbcnews.com
trump summons the ceo court for another china photo-op

Trump hosts a support group for CEOs learning to pretend his trade chaos is a business strategy.
Trump has once again assembled his favorite species of American — the billionaire CEO — as set dressing for his latest attempt to look tough on China while desperately wanting a deal he can call "historic" on Fox & Friends. NBC notes that the invite to top executives is mostly posturing, which is a polite way of saying "stage-managed cosplay of economic statecraft" where the people whose supply chains he wrecked are dragged in to clap for the arsonist.
The White House is selling this as high-stakes strategy; in practice it's a casting call for whichever corporate leaders are willing to nod gravely while Trump alternates between threatening more tariffs and insisting the U.S. and China have a "fantastic relationship." Workers, farmers, and small businesses who got steamrolled by his trade war don't get an invite to this little oligarch salon — just the folks who can quietly pass the costs down the line and then pocket the tax cuts.
So the "deal" talk is less about fixing structural problems with China and more about producing a market-calming photo-op: Trump, Xi, and a ring of CEOs pretending this is all part of a 4D chess plan and not the diplomatic equivalent of a hostage negotiation conducted by reality TV producers. It’s the Trump doctrine in one tableau: break global trade, then ask the richest guys in the room to help you spin the rubble as a win.
Source: nbcnews.com
trump deports colombian woman to congo, congo says 'absolutely not'

A peaceful city park in Kinshasa, where the government somehow managed to show more concern for a sick deportee’s health than the self-styled beacon of human rights that tried to dump her there.
The Trump administration has now reached the "spin the globe and pick a country" phase of its deportation policy. A federal judge ruled that ICE and the State Department most likely broke the law when they deported a 55-year-old Colombian woman, Adriana Maria Quiroz Zapata, to the Democratic Republic of Congo — a country that had explicitly said it would not take her. The judge has done the unthinkable in Trump’s immigration universe: ordered the U.S. to bring her back.
This fiasco is the byproduct of the White House leaning on agencies to find any country willing to accept migrants who can’t legally be sent home because they’d likely face persecution or torture there. So they cut side deals with governments, then tried to dump Ms. Zapata in Congo even after Congolese officials wrote ICE to say they couldn’t medically care for her diabetes, hyperlipidemia and hypothyroidism. When Congo is the one lecturing the United States on basic human decency and capacity, you know the moral floor has collapsed.
Rather than follow court rulings or basic asylum law, the administration’s strategy is essentially: "What if we just ignore everyone — judges, doctors, foreign governments — and see who we can shove on a plane?" It took a federal judge to point out that yes, that’s still illegal, even if Stephen Miller drew it on a whiteboard once. The cruelty isn’t a bug; it’s the operating system — and every now and then, an actual court hits Ctrl+Alt+Delete.
Source: nytimes.com
trump and rubio sanction free speech, lose to the first amendment

Marco Rubio, America’s top diplomat by Reddit mod standards, furrows his brow while discovering that "I don’t like your opinion" is not actually a legal basis for sanctions.
Source: theguardian.com
trump presidential library to be first built entirely out of emoluments

Artist’s rendering of the Trump Presidential Library, where the exhibits are optional but the resort fees are mandatory.