The Trump Presidency Is Going Great

The Trump administration’s latest attempt at mass human disposal hit a small snag called "the law" after Judge Ana Reyes blocked Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem from yanking Temporary Protected Status from up to 350,000 Haitians. Noem had apparently decided that people fleeing a collapsed state wracked by gangs and displacement were actually "killers, leeches, or entitlement junkies" – a description that, awkwardly, turned out to fit the administration’s moral compass better than the plaintiffs.

Reyes, in an 83-page opinion that sounded a lot like "have you people met the Constitution?", pointed out that the Haitian TPS holders in front of her were not Noem’s cartoon villains, but a neuroscientist researching Alzheimer’s, a software engineer at a national bank, a toxicology lab assistant, a college economics major, and a full-time registered nurse. She also noted it was "substantially likely" that Noem’s decision was preordained by "hostility to nonwhite immigrants" – legalese for "this was a racist stunt in search of a justification."

For now, the termination is "null, void, and of no legal effect," which is also a solid working description of this administration’s moral authority. Meanwhile, the same crew has been busy canceling protections for about 600,000 Venezuelans, 60,000 people from Honduras, Nicaragua, and Nepal, more than 160,000 Ukrainians, and thousands from Afghanistan and Cameroon – all while insisting this is about "security" and not a mass deportation fantasy dreamed up by people who think the Statue of Liberty should carry an AR-15 and a homeowner’s association rulebook.

Attorneys for the Haitian TPS holders warned that if Noem’s termination stands, "people will almost certainly die" – from killing, disease, or starvation. The administration’s position, boiled down, is that this is an acceptable outcome so long as Fox & Friends gets a good segment out of it. The judiciary, for the moment, disagrees. Enjoy the stay of execution while it lasts.

The Trump administration has discovered a bold new innovation in representative democracy: don’t actually test how to count people. The Census Bureau’s 2026 operational test for the 2030 census is being dramatically downsized from six states and a national sample to just two sites — Spartanburg, S.C., and Huntsville, Ala. Rural communities in western Texas and multiple tribal lands in Arizona and North Carolina have been quietly dropped, because why waste precious resources accurately counting people who aren’t big fans of authoritarian cosplay?

To really drive home the commitment to accuracy, the administration is also killing plans for Spanish- and Chinese-language online forms, leaving the test in English only. So the communities that are historically undercounted will now be scientifically under-tested as well. At the same time, the White House wants to experiment with replacing trained temporary census workers with already-overloaded USPS staff — because if there’s one institution Trump-world hasn’t finished kneecapping yet, it’s the Postal Service.

Meanwhile, the Census Bureau has refused to brief the members of Congress who are supposed to oversee it, and the administration has disbanded all of the bureau’s outside advisory committees, effectively pulling what one expert calls a “black-out shade” over 2030 planning. Translation: they’re messing with the machinery that decides political representation and hundreds of billions in federal funding, and they’d prefer you not watch while they do it. It’s less a census test and more a dry run for how far they can push voter dilution and structural minority rule before anyone manages to turn the lights back on.

Donald Trump watched the Grammys, heard Trevor Noah make one Epstein joke, and immediately decided the real crime in America is defamation against Donald Trump. After Noah quipped that Trump needed Greenland since "Epstein's island is gone" and he needs a new place to hang with Bill Clinton, the president jumped onto Truth Social to call Noah a "poor, pathetic, talentless dope" and promised to sic his lawyers on him for "plenty$"—because nothing says "totally innocent and not defensive at all" like threatening to sue over an awards-show punchline.

Trump insisted he has "never been to Epstein Island" and, more importantly, had never even been accused of it "not even by the Fake News Media"—which is a very normal thing for a president to angrily clarify during the Grammys. Meanwhile, the crowd and artists spent the night denouncing his anti-immigrant policies, wearing anti-ICE pins, and reminding the country that "no one is illegal on stolen land", which probably didn’t help his mood as he live-posted through being publicly clowned.

This tantrum slots neatly into the broader second-term project: punishing comedians and media that dare to mock Dear Leader. Stephen Colbert’s show is being axed by CBS after he criticized the company for settling a $16m lawsuit with Trump (totally unrelated, they swear), Jimmy Kimmel got suspended by Disney and briefly had the president lobbying the FCC to yank ABC’s license, and Bari Weiss now oversees CBS’s rightward drift while Trump cheers the Grammys getting booted from the network as "garbage". The message is clear: criticize Trump and you might lose your show; joke about Trump and Epstein and he’ll threaten to sue you personally.

Noah, on his way out after six years hosting, responded to the outrage in real time: "It’s my last year! What are you gonna do about it?" The president has answered: deploy the lawyers, weaponize the chill, and keep testing how far a White House can go in treating mockery as a legal offense. Free speech is still technically alive; it’s just being sued, canceled, and harassed by the guy who swore an oath to protect it.

Donald Trump has bestowed his "Complete and Total Endorsement" on former senator John Sununu in the New Hampshire Senate race, because nothing says strong movement like a twice-impeached, insurrection-adjacent ex-president handpicking who’s allowed to run in a supposedly independent party primary. Sununu once wrote an op-ed calling Trump a "loser" while backing Nikki Haley, but in MAGA world, all sins are forgiven as long as you’re willing to carry the "America First" banner and pretend the cult leader is still the main character of American politics.

Democrat Chris Pappas responded by simply reposting Trump’s endorsement and saying he "approves this message," which is what you do when your opponent voluntarily brands himself as Trump’s franchise location in New Hampshire. Meanwhile, Scott Brown — former Massachusetts senator, Trump ambassador, and now rejected applicant for the MAGA loyalty badge — bravely announced he will "keep working," which here means running against both Sununu and the reality that Trump owns the GOP like another failed casino.

The RNC dutifully declared the race a top priority, thrilled that the party’s Senate strategy still boils down to: wait for Trump to pick a favorite, call it grassroots energy, and hope voters don’t notice the entire process is being run like a licensing deal for the "America First" trademark. Representative democracy, but with brand management.

In a plot twist no one at Mar-a-Lago focus group headquarters saw coming, Democrat Taylor Rehmet just flipped a Trump +17 Texas state Senate district by more than 14 points, because nothing says "mandate for authoritarian rule" like losing a blood-red seat to a union guy with a toolbox. This is a district Republicans have hugged tightly for decades, but apparently even Fort Worth-area voters have their limits on culture war cosplay and billionaire tax cuts.

Trump personally jumped onto his vanity social media app to boost Republican Leigh Wambsganss, calling her a "successful entrepreneur" and "incredible" MAGA loyalist, which turned out to be the electoral equivalent of a curse. Meanwhile, Rehmet — an Air Force veteran and machinist — ran on boring, dangerous ideas like lowering costs, funding public schools, and protecting jobs, and somehow that beat "more Trump, but from Austin." Democrats, already on a streak of special-election overperformance under Trump 2.0, are treating this as yet another neon warning sign that voters might not be fully on board with the whole slow-motion-democracy-strangulation project.

Rehmet only gets the seat until January unless he wins again in November, and the Texas GOP still holds a comfy majority, so no, this isn’t the part where the credits roll and everything is fine. But in a state where Republicans custom-ordered the maps and still managed to trip over their own gerrymander, a MAGA-branded candidate getting clobbered in a deep-red district is a useful reminder: you can suppress voters, you can rig districts, you can scream "fraud" into every microphone — but sometimes, people just walk into a voting booth and say, "actually, no."

Germany’s football federation took a brave stand against authoritarianism by announcing that, after deep reflection on Donald Trump’s travel bans, threats of tariffs over his Greenland cosplay annexation bid, and his tear-gassing-protesters-for-photoshoot governing style, they have decided to… play the group stage in Houston, Toronto, and New Jersey. Because nothing says sending a message to Trump like absolutely not changing your plans at all.

DFB vice‑president Oke Göttlich briefly flirted with the radical notion that maybe holding a giant sports festival in a country busy menacing Europe, roughing up domestic protesters, and playing regime-change tourist in Venezuela might be a bad look. The federation swiftly smacked that down, insisting such debates should be held "internally"—in other words, behind closed doors where they can be safely ignored while everyone pretends football is magically separate from politics, visas, tariffs, and border guards with guns.

France chimed in with the same bold energy, saying there is currently “no desire” to boycott this “great competition,” though they graciously left the door open to caring later if things get even more on‑fire. Meanwhile, fans are staring down obscene ticket prices and Trump’s travel bans, which might bar some supporters from even entering the country. So the official line is: sport is unifying, politics should stay out of it, and if your fans can’t get past Trump’s border regime, well, at least the TV signal still crosses borders.

Fifa’s own disgraced ex‑lord Sepp Blatter is telling people not to travel to the US—when Sepp Blatter thinks your World Cup optics are too corrupt and unstable, that’s an achievement. But the DFB insists they’ll be there to “celebrate a peaceful festival of football,” apparently confident that Trump’s America will suspend the creeping police‑state vibes for 90 minutes at a time. The message to Trump is clear: keep undermining democracy and cracking down on dissent, just don’t touch the kickoff time.

Don Lemon, former CNN anchor and current full-time Trump nemesis, was arrested by federal agents in Los Angeles for the unthinkable crime of … filming a protest in a Minnesota church. The Trump justice department is charging him and three others with civil rights crimes for allegedly interfering with religious freedom — because nothing says "defending the Constitution" like using civil rights law as a club against journalists who film protests against ICE.

Abbe Lowell, Lemon’s lawyer, noted that a federal magistrate judge already looked at this and basically said: "you’ve got nothing" — twice. So naturally, Pam Bondi’s DOJ did what any healthy democracy would do: got enraged, vowed to "pursue this to the ends of the Earth" on Megyn Kelly’s show, then sent the feds back in anyway. Meanwhile, independent journalist Georgia Fort was also arrested for the radical act of holding a camera, and press freedom groups are calling this what it obviously is: a "naked attack" on the First Amendment.

The White House responded with the seriousness the moment demanded by posting on X: "When life gives you Lemons" with a chain emoji — because nothing screams "not a police state" like the president’s official account openly celebrating the arrest of a journalist. Top Democrats called it authoritarian, a "police state" move, and "pure authoritarian bile", which is Washington-speak for "this is what we used to condemn in other countries." But sure, tell us again how this is the administration bravely defending religious liberty and civil rights — by arresting the press after a judge already said there was no evidence of a crime.

Trump, ever the neutral observer, called Lemon a "loser, lightweight" and denounced his walk into the church as "terrible" while praising the pastor as a victim of being "accosted" by people with cameras. In other words, the DOJ has been repurposed from "justice" to "Department of Vengeance", civil rights law now protects you from being criticized, and journalists are being hauled off in chains to send a message. But don’t worry, democracy is doing great.