The Trump Presidency Timeline
Documenting the chaos since day one. 1597 entries and counting.
trump’s fake prosecutors keep getting caught playing dress‑up

Lindsey Halligan, briefly starring in the role of ‘U.S. Attorney’ in Trump’s community theater production of The Justice Department, before the judge closed the show for false advertising.
Lindsey Halligan, a Trump loyalist who wandered into the Justice Department from the glamorous world of insurance law, is now officially not employed by DOJ after a federal judge said she had to stop “masquerading” as the U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia. Halligan, who had exactly zero prosecutorial experience, nonetheless managed to pose as the top federal prosecutor while pursuing two failed cases against Trump’s perceived enemies, because nothing says independent law enforcement like sending the president’s personal lawyer to go settle scores.
Judge David Novak — a Trump appointee, just to really underline how bad this was — found she was unlawfully holding the role and politely suggested she stop LARPing as a U.S. Attorney. He declined to refer her for disciplinary proceedings, generously blaming it on her “inexperience” rather than the obvious problem: a Justice Department being run like Trump’s personal Patreon perk. Halligan now joins fellow Trump fixer Alina Habba, who was also disqualified as an acting U.S. Attorney in New Jersey but somehow managed to cling to a DOJ job afterward, as part of the growing alumni network of Make Prosecutorial Misconduct Great Again.
In other words, Trump’s DOJ staffing strategy remains consistent: don’t pick seasoned prosecutors who know the law; pick personal loyalists who know him, shove them into top jobs they’re not qualified for, and then act shocked when courts notice that the nation’s premier law enforcement agency is being run like a third-tier revenge law firm with government letterhead. But sure, we’re told, the real threat to the rule of law is career civil servants and law professors posting mean things on the internet.
Source: nbcnews.com
trump’s tariff tantrum meets ted’s bloodbath math

Ted Cruz explains to donors that the economy is on fire and Trump’s response was to yell at the smoke detector.
On a secretly recorded donor call, Ted Cruz helpfully confirmed what everyone already suspected: when confronted with basic political reality, Donald Trump’s presidential instinct is to scream “fuck you, Ted” and hang up. Cruz says he warned Trump in 2025 that his shiny new round of sweeping tariffs might turn the 2026 midterms into an economic “bloodbath” if 401(k)s tanked and prices kept climbing. In other words, the GOP’s big concern about Trump’s trade policy isn’t that it wrecks people’s lives — it’s that it might wreck their House majority.
Cruz reportedly told Trump that if voters hit election day with retirement accounts down 30% and grocery prices up 10–20%, Republicans would lose the House, lose the Senate, and Trump would spend “the next two years being impeached every single week.” Trump, noted master dealmaker and stable genius, responded by yelling and cursing at multiple GOP senators, because nothing says “serious steward of the economy” like throwing a profanity-laced fit when someone explains how math and inflation work.
The public, rudely failing to appreciate this 4D chess, currently gives Trump a 34% approval rating on the cost of living, with 64% disapproving — a fun number if you’re into watching your own coalition peel away in real time. Meanwhile, Cruz used the same recording to torch Vice-President JD Vance as Tucker Carlson’s puppet, accusing the Vance–Tucker tag team of ousting national security adviser Mike Waltz for wanting to bomb Iran. So the party of law and order now features a president running an economy into the ground with tariffs, a veep allegedly installed by a TV demagogue, and a senator live-commentating the implosion on hidden tape. But sure, tell us more about how this is all going according to plan.
Source: theguardian.com
trump fights fraud by starving children first, asking questions never

Trump administration officials bravely shielding taxpayers from the grave threat of low-income kids having somewhere safe to go while their parents work.
Source: theguardian.com
sure, let google write the plane safety rules, what could go wrong

Trump DOT officials proudly watching Google Gemini hallucinate the next federal safety rule, while a plane flies overhead and everyone pretends this is fine.
Source: propublica.org
trump’s border cops shoot a citizen, then seize the evidence

Nothing says “public safety” like killing a citizen at a protest and then treating the evidence like it’s Mar-a-Lago’s server room.
In Minneapolis, 37-year-old U.S. citizen Alex Pretti was shot and killed by federal officers during an immigration enforcement protest, and the Trump administration’s response has been: shoot first, stonewall later. Minnesota Sen. Tina Smith says the feds are flat-out ignoring a court order that lets state investigators access the evidence. State investigators reportedly had to get a warrant just to see the basic facts of a killing in their own city, and even then federal agents still refused to hand anything over—because nothing says "we did nothing wrong" like hiding the evidence from everyone with a badge you don’t control.
DHS Secretary Kristi Noem helpfully announced that her own department will lead the investigation into the killing committed by…her own department. Meanwhile, Minneapolis Police Chief Brian O’Hara says he’s gotten zero cooperation or information from DHS. Even Senate Republicans like Thom Tillis and Bill Cassidy are nervously edging away from the crime scene, demanding a “thorough and impartial” joint investigation and warning the White House not to shut out local law enforcement—translation: this looks bad even to people who thought family separation was just tough love.
On TV, Trump’s Border Patrol czar Greg Bovino declared that the armed federal agents are actually "the victims" and insisted Pretti “perpetrated violence” and approached officers with a weapon. The problem: video and eyewitness accounts so far say that’s not what happened, and NPR hasn’t verified any evidence that Pretti ever brandished his handgun. Then Trump-appointed U.S. Attorney Bill Essayli chimed in on X to explain that if you approach law enforcement with a gun, officers are “legally justified” in shooting you—an exciting new doctrine that even the NRA and Rep. Thomas Massie think sounds like a constitutional tire fire. In other words, the same crowd that screams "shall not be infringed" is now watching Trump’s immigration machine argue that merely existing near cops with a firearm is a death sentence. But sure, tell us more about how this is all about law and order.
Source: npr.org
trump’s doj discovers separation of powers is, unfortunately, still a thing

Trump’s justice department, moments after learning that “go around the judge” is not actually a recognized legal doctrine.
Source: theguardian.com
trump discovers the off switch for europe’s wallet

Ursula von der Leyen studies a QR code, trying to figure out how to pay for lunch without routing the transaction through Donald Trump’s mood swings.
Source: theguardian.com
bbc discovers americans are somehow still into this guy

A calm BBC explainer asking how popular the arsonist is while the house smolders picturesquely in the background.
In tidy charts and calm narration, Atkins walks through how Americans are processing a news cycle that ping-pongs from Venezuela to Greenland to Minneapolis to Washington, DC—while Trump’s approval rating shuffles around like it’s just another normal presidency and not a rolling stress test of whether checks and balances actually work. Because nothing says "healthy democracy" like needing an explainer on how many people are still cool with a guy who openly dreams of being president-for-life.
The piece politely asks how Americans feel about their president, delicately sidestepping the obvious follow-up: how many are fine with the grift, the strongman cosplay, and the permanent state of constitutional brinkmanship—as long as their side is "winning." In other words: it’s a popularity contest where the prize is what’s left of American democracy, but sure, let’s focus on the graphics.
Source: bbc.com
from ‘we need real news’ to ‘have you tried fascism?’

Tucker Carlson, back when his bow tie was the most dangerous thing about him, explaining freedom of the press before spending a decade helping his viewers hate it.
Source: theguardian.com
the invisible man vs the very loud fascist

Joe Biden fades into the background while Trump stands at center stage furiously rewriting January 6 as a patriotic field trip.
Trump has junked Biden’s climate agenda in favor of burning everything that isn’t nailed down, pitching fossil fuels as the patriotic power source of the AI future while launching an unrestrained assault on clean energy. He’s also busy purging thousands of career officials, imposing loyalty tests, and gutting agencies that were once semi-insulated from political interference. In healthcare, he’s elevated Robert F. Kennedy Jr and other fringe cranks, because who needs science when you have vibes? Meanwhile, DEI frameworks are being torched across government, universities are under sustained political attack, and immigration policy—legal and illegal—is being hardened into something that looks less like governance and more like a Fox News comment section with subpoena power.
On the world stage, Trump is "sketching a new world order" based on raw power and economic coercion, threatening to seize land and slap allies with tariffs like it’s his old bankruptcy lawyer doing foreign policy. NATO and support for Ukraine—cornerstones of Biden’s foreign policy—are out; territorial threats and transactional shakedowns are in. In other words, it’s American imperial cosplay with none of the competence and all of the extortion. Biden, increasingly seen by Democrats as the guy who clung to the 2024 nomination just long enough to hand the country back to Trump, is fading into the background. But Trump and the GOP won’t let him disappear entirely—they need "Crooked Joe" and "Sleepy Joe" as the eternal scapegoat while they dismantle what’s left of the postwar democratic order in real time.
So Biden becomes the "invisible man"—and Trump becomes the guy using the full machinery of the state to turn his resentments into policy. One is writing a book; the other is writing a manual on how to kill a democracy and call it patriotism, but sure, let’s keep debating who "looked weak" on a debate stage two years ago.
Source: theguardian.com
supreme court discovers limits to trump’s power… when rich people’s portfolios are at risk

Trump glares at the Federal Reserve building, wondering why the money printer won’t just go brrr on his command.
Donald Trump is running his usual playbook on the Federal Reserve: demand lower interest rates, insult the Fed chair as “stupid” when he doesn’t comply, and then unleash the Department of Justice to open a criminal investigation into Jerome Powell for the high crime of… talking about building renovations. In other words, it’s the same authoritarian power grab as everywhere else in his administration, just with more marble and fewer children in cages.
Trump also fired Fed governor Lisa Cook in August over mortgage-fraud allegations that first appeared on social media, with no investigation, no hearing, and no due process. A lower court called nonsense and temporarily reinstated her, so naturally the White House sprinted to the Supreme Court to ask the six-justice MAGA supermajority to bless Dear Leader’s right to purge independent officials at will. This is all part of the conservative legal movement’s beloved unitary executive fantasy, where the president can fire anyone, anytime, for any reason, and the only check is “elections” – which is very convenient if you’re also busy undermining elections.
The twist: the same court that cheerfully greenlit Trump’s firings at the NLRB and FTC suddenly got very concerned about statutory limits and independence once it was the Fed’s turn. The justices, who have been busy “making war on independent agencies”, are now carving out a special exception for the central bank, because nothing says principled constitutionalism like deciding the law means one thing for labor regulators and another for the people who set interest rates for JPMorgan. Amy Coney Barrett is suddenly fretting over economists’ warnings that firing Cook could trigger a recession, and Brett Kavanaugh is worried that if Trump can purge Fed officials at will, a future Democratic president might do the same to his team. What goes around comes around, and apparently that’s the one thing this Court won’t allow.
So the Court may actually slap Trump’s hand here – not because they’ve discovered a newfound love for checks and balances, but because destabilizing the Fed might tank markets and upset donors. Independent agencies that protect workers or consumers? Totally expendable under the new imperial presidency. But the Fed, the quasi-private temple of global finance? That gets wrapped in constitutional bubble wrap. The message from the Roberts Court is clear: Trump can centralize power and purge watchdogs all he wants, as long as he doesn’t mess with the interest-rate machine that keeps the oligarchy happy. But sure, tell us again about their neutral, principled jurisprudence.
Source: theguardian.com
trump doj heroically saves money by not fighting child sex traffickers

The Trump DOJ, boldly confronting the scourge of child sex trafficking by canceling the conference that trains people to fight it and then not returning reporters’ calls.
The Trump justice department has discovered an exciting new way to be "tough on crime": stop funding the people who catch criminals. The DOJ has slashed money and training for law enforcement investigating child sex crimes, including canceling the 2025 National Law Enforcement Training on Child Exploitation because nothing says "protect the children" like pulling the plug on the one conference that teaches cops how to track predators using AI and new platforms. Prosecutors now have to beg to justify basic things like training, trial prep, and meeting with victims, and the answer is almost always no—because apparently the "core mission" of the justice department is not prosecuting child predators.
Internet Crimes Against Children (ICAC) taskforces are losing their annual grants, meetings between DOJ, ICAC commanders, NCMEC, and tech companies have been quietly killed off, and investigators are left to "beg and plead" other sources for money just to afford the software and staff needed to find abused kids. The work is already traumatizing and isolating, but sure, let's also cut off the professional support network that keeps people from burning out. Meanwhile, the department refuses to release the full investigative files on convicted child sex trafficker and Trump pal Jeffrey Epstein, but insists it can both protect children and use taxpayer dollars efficiently. In other words: we absolutely could go after child predators, we just choose not to—and please stop asking about Epstein.
Law enforcement who once thought this administration would be "pro-law enforcement" and serious about trafficking are now describing the situation as "disheartening"—a very polite way of saying "we're being kneecapped from above while they cosplay as defenders of children on TV." But hey, if you gut anti-trafficking programs, starve survivor support, and make it harder to prosecute child sex offenders, you can save a few bucks and keep some old friends comfortable. Law and order, Trump-style.
Source: theguardian.com
king leer gets more orange, world gets more on fire

Behold: "King Leer" Trump, holding court in the crumbling ruins of democracy while the world’s leaders giggle along like it’s all just great television.
Source: theguardian.com
trump declares slavery 'improper ideology,' orders history to knock it off

Informational panel at the President’s House, seen before the Trump administration decided that acknowledging slavery was just a little too "divisive" for their brand of patriotism.
Source: theguardian.com
maga turns a murdered refugee into a billboard campaign

Nothing honors a murdered refugee like turning her photo into a multi-million-dollar right-wing marketing asset.
Source: theguardian.com
trump’s deportation reality show turns daily life into a horror movie

ICE agents, bravely defending America from the existential threat of children walking to school and parents checking in with the principal.
Source: theguardian.com
who you gonna believe, trump or the video of the killing

Donald Trump explaining that the ICE shooting you just watched actually proves the victim was a terrorist, because in this administration the camera is always wrong and Dear Leader is always right.
Donald Trump has apparently updated the presidential seal to read: “Who you gonna believe, me or your lying eyes?” After an ICE agent, Jonathan Ross, shot and killed Renee Nicole Good in Minneapolis, Trump immediately rushed to Truth Social to declare that Good was part of a “Radical Left Movement of Violence and Hate” who had “viciously ran over” the officer — a claim that collapsed the second anyone watched the video showing Ross was never knocked down and calmly walked away after shooting her three times.
Because nothing says “law and order” like inventing a terrorist attack that didn’t happen, Trump’s lie became the official party line. Homeland Security secretary Kristi Noem eagerly branded Good a “rioter and domestic terrorist,” and VP JD Vance chimed in by calling her a “deranged leftist.” In other words, the federal government is now running on a simple operating principle: if state violence looks bad on camera, just declare the victim a terrorist and dare people to argue with you.
This is the same magical thinking Trump applies to everything else: insisting there’s “no inflation” while food prices are up 3.1% and coffee is up nearly 20%, claiming gas is $1.99 “in much of the country” while the national average sits over $2.80, and bragging about cutting drug prices by 500%, 1,400%, or maybe 3,000% — numbers that would make a sixth-grade math teacher file an ethics complaint. Meanwhile he’s still pushing that Ukraine started its own war, Portland is burning to the ground, Obama founded ISIS, the Capitol police caused Jan. 6, and oh yes, Haitian immigrants are eating people’s pets in Ohio.
What ties it all together is the authoritarian core: Trump is openly testing how far he can replace observable reality with presidential fan fiction, knowing rightwing media will dutifully repeat it and his base will treat it as scripture. When the president can watch a video of an ICE killing and then order everyone to pretend it shows the opposite, that isn’t just lying — that’s practice for government by pure propaganda. But sure, tell us more about how this is all about “owning the libs.”
Source: theguardian.com
trump rage-uninvites canada from his make-believe ‘board of peace’

Trump, moments before explaining that real diplomacy is when you uninvite your closest ally from your imaginary peace club because they hurt your feelings.
Source: today.com
trump’s cdc boldly takes aim at public enemy #1: not overdosing alone

CDC officials bravely debating whether telling people not to die alone might be ‘too encouraging’ of survival.
Source: theguardian.com
american gerontocracy: now with extra 25th amendment hand‑wringing

Mary Berry retires with dignity; America looks at Trump and says, ‘What if we just never stopped this show ever?’
We get a polite reminder that in normal countries, age discrimination is illegal but actual incompetence is still grounds for retirement. Then we hop across the Atlantic, where Donald Trump, nearly 80 and already once declared mentally unfit by a small army of psychiatrists, is back in the Oval Office because nothing says “healthy democracy” like ignoring the giant red warning lights and just hoping the 25th Amendment will do CrossFit.
The piece walks through how impossible it is to remove a clearly unfit president: you need the VP and two-thirds of both houses of Congress, which in Trump’s Washington means asking his loyalists to admit the emperor has no clothes while they’re busy selling MAGA-branded fig leaves. But sure, let’s all comfort ourselves that if things go off the rails, the system will totally work this time. After all, it worked so well the first term.
Source: theguardian.com