america first, allies last, laws optional
Trump contemplates foreign policy the only way he knows how: as a reality show where the prize is unchecked military power and nobody reads the fine print of the Constitution.
Turns out "America First" was never about staying home and minding our own business; it was about giving Donald Trump a blank check to throw U.S. power around the world like a bored oligarch with a drone fleet. NPR politely notes that in his first year back in office, Trump has made it clear this isn’t isolationism at all — it’s just unilateralism with worse manners, where treaties, allies, and Congress are speed bumps on the way to whatever impulsive flex he wants that day.
Aggressive use of unilateral power is doing a lot of work here. It means foreign policy made by one guy’s ego and a phone, weaponizing the world’s largest military and economy without meaningful oversight, because nothing says "responsible superpower" like improvising grand strategy between rallies and grievance posts. In other words, "America First" has fully matured into what it always was: a branding exercise for using the United States as a personal cudgel on the global stage — killing democracy abroad while eroding it at home, but sure, tell us more about how this is just a "doctrine" and not a long-running constitutional crisis.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump discovers piracy, calls it foreign policy
Trump, staring at a map of Venezuela and Greenland like it’s the menu at a steakhouse, deciding which country’s resources to ‘reimburse’ himself with next.
Donald Trump has decided that international law is for losers and that Venezuelan oil on seized tankers is basically a Black Friday doorbuster for the United States. Asked what happens to the oil, he shrugged out loud: “Maybe we will sell it, maybe we will keep it … We’re keeping the ships also.” Because nothing says rules-based international order like “finders keepers” on the high seas backed by the Pentagon.
This isn’t a one-off brain worm, it’s a doctrine. Trump has spent years insisting the US should have “taken the oil” in Iraq, bragging in Syria that “we’ve secured the oil” and hinting ExxonMobil could just wander in and start pumping. Now he’s labeling fentanyl a “weapon of mass destruction” to justify a Venezuela pressure campaign that — surprise — just happens to involve grabbing their oil. In other words, it’s the Iraq War logic but with the PR department turned off and the looting turned up.
And when he’s not playing pirate in the Caribbean, he’s shopping for minerals like a Bond villain with a world map. He’s threatened using force to seize Greenland from Denmark for its cobalt, lithium, and rare earths, while his administration eyes a direct stake in a major mine there. He struck a deal with Ukraine offering “continued military support” in exchange for privileged access to its minerals and uranium — a neat little arrangement where security guarantees come with a resource rider. Meanwhile, he’s trying to block Iran from selling its oil to anyone, because only Washington is allowed to sell hydrocarbons, apparently.
Experts call this “resource imperialism” and “resource nationalism.” Trump just calls it Tuesday. He rails against the “green scam” at the UN, demands allies drill more fossil fuels, and treats climate science as an inconvenient rumor. Previous presidents at least pretended it was about “market stability” and “multilateralism.” Trump’s innovation is to rip off the mask and say the quiet part into a live mic: US power exists to grab oil, gas, and minerals wherever they are, and if that looks like 19th-century gunboat diplomacy with nukes, well, he thinks that’s what makes America “great again.”
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump’s ‘peace through strength’ gives gaza war, famine, and a photo-op truce
Democracy™ in action: U.S.-funded jets overhead, rubble below, and somewhere in Washington a press release calling this a ‘complex humanitarian situation.’
NBC walks through 2025 in Gaza: a year where Israel keeps bombing a trapped civilian population, famine spreads, and the U.S. response is basically, ‘have you tried more precision munitions and fewer calories?’ Schools, hospitals, and apartment blocks get turned into rubble, but don’t worry, State Department spokespeople assure us this is all happening under the strictest possible "rules of engagement" that somehow always end with starving kids.
Washington keeps shipping weapons and political cover while pretending to be the adult in the room pushing for a "truce"—which mostly means pausing the killing just long enough to restock the bombs and reset the talking points. The same administration that screams about border security is perfectly fine underwriting an open-air siege that manufactures refugees by the tens of thousands, because nothing says "defending democracy" like bankrolling collective punishment.
And when famine hits, the U.S. and its allies discover a bold new strategy: airdrop a few pallets of food, film it, and call it humanitarian leadership while backing the very blockade that created the famine. In other words, war as usual: military contractors eat well, politicians get to posture about "stability," and Gazans get to choose between being bombed quickly or starved slowly.
#imperialism#killing-democracy#lawlessness
trump's navy seals the drug war with more explosions
Nothing says 'rule of law' like turning an alleged drug boat into a floating bonfire in international waters and calling it freedom.
The Trump administration has discovered a bold new legal doctrine: if you label something 'narco-terrorism' loudly enough, you can blow it up in the middle of the ocean and call it national security. U.S. Southern Command announced that a fresh strike on an "alleged" drug boat in the eastern Pacific killed one "narco-terrorist"—because nothing says due process like airstrikes on vessels "transiting along known narco-trafficking routes."
The hit was carried out, per SOUTHCOM’s proud post on X, at the direction of Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, Fox News’ answer to a law-of-war seminar. The Pentagon insists these boats are carrying narcotics to the U.S., which is very reassuring given the extremely rigorous standard of proof known as "we said so in a press release." On the same day, President Trump was issuing public warnings to the presidents of Venezuela and Colombia, just to make sure everyone understood this isn’t law enforcement—it’s geopolitical theater with live ammunition.
In other words, the drug war has officially gone full Tom Clancy LARP: the Pentagon is running floating execution squads in international waters, the White House is saber-rattling at Latin American leaders, and the only apparent oversight is a tweet thread. But sure, tell us more about how this is all about keeping fentanyl off the streets and not about expanding presidential war powers wherever there’s ocean and a convenient label like "narco-terrorist."
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump sends louisiana man to go colonize greenland
Jeff Landry checks a map to confirm that, yes, the giant ice-covered island he’s supposed to annex is in fact not Louisiana.
Donald Trump has once again decided that international law is more of a vibe than a rulebook, appointing Louisiana governor Jeff Landry as "special envoy to Greenland" – a semi-autonomous part of Denmark that he has repeatedly said he wants to annex, like it’s a golf course with better ice. Landry proudly announced he’ll serve in a "volunteer position to make Greenland a part of the United States", because nothing says respect for sovereignty like publicly declaring your goal is to absorb someone else’s territory.
Denmark’s government, apparently still under the illusion that borders mean something, called the move "deeply upsetting" and reminded Washington that Danish territorial integrity is not a suggestion box. Greenland’s prime minister politely responded with the diplomatic equivalent of "absolutely not", stressing that "Greenland belongs to Greenlanders" and that an American envoy doesn’t magically turn their island into Trump National Nuuk. Polls show Greenlanders overwhelmingly oppose joining the US, which makes this whole project very on-brand: an administration that can’t win consent at home now fantasizing about forced acquisitions abroad.
Trump, back in the White House and once again fixated on Greenland’s "strategic location" and mineral wealth, is now refusing to rule out using force to take control of the island – against a NATO ally, during escalating Arctic competition, in a region central to US and alliance security planning. In other words: the guy who screams about "sovereignty" every time someone criticizes him is now openly toying with threatening an ally’s sovereignty to grab resources, because . But sure, tell us again how this is all about national security and not a half-baked colonial fantasy with nuclear submarines.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
regime change speedrun, now with bonus coast guard
Adam Smith leaving yet another classified briefing where, presumably, someone had to explain to the Trump administration that "blockade" is not actually a synonym for "press release."
Donald Trump has discovered a fun new toy: the U.S. Coast Guard. Instead of, say, protecting maritime safety, Trump has them chasing Venezuelan oil tankers around the Caribbean like it's a low-budget Tom Clancy reboot. Representative Adam Smith, the top Democrat on the House Armed Services Committee, helpfully says the quiet part out loud: this "total and complete blockade" of Venezuelan oil isn't about enforcing international law, it's about regime change.
Because nothing says "rules-based international order" like unilaterally declaring an oil blockade, seizing ships, and then pretending it's all about cracking down on "false flag" and "dark fleet" vessels. In other words, Trump has basically decided he's the hemispheric oil traffic cop and Maduro's government is getting pulled over for the crime of existing.
So we now have the Department of Homeland Security and the Coast Guard running around pursuing yet another tanker—the third this month—while Trump brags about shutting down Venezuela's sanctioned exports. The constitutional role of Congress in authorizing conflicts or sanctions escalation? The minor detail that blockades are traditionally acts of war? Don't worry, the guy who thought nuking hurricanes was a policy option has it handled. But sure, tell us again how it's the other countries that don't respect international law.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump invents maritime law, repossesses venezuela’s oil
US warship patrolling off Venezuela, bravely defending America from the grave threat of other countries having their own oil.
US forces have now stopped a second merchant vessel in international waters off Venezuela, because nothing says "rules-based international order" like playing pirate cosplay with the world’s shipping lanes. This follows the earlier seizure of an oil tanker and Trump’s very normal, definitely-legal announcement of a "total and complete" blockade on all sanctioned oil tankers going in and out of the country — no UN mandate, no declaration of war, just vibes and a carrier group.
Trump went on TV to remind everyone this isn’t about imperial nostalgia or oil, it’s about… imperial nostalgia and oil. Venezuela, he claims, "took all of our energy rights" and "we want it back" because they "illegally took it" — in other words, nationalized their own resources, which Washington has decided is now a retroactive crime against the United States. Meanwhile, the US military keeps blowing up alleged drug-trafficking boats in the eastern Pacific, killing 99 people since September, while insisting this is totally about narcotics and definitely not about regime change. Maduro accuses the US of trying to overthrow him, which the administration helpfully underlines by refusing to rule out a war and parking the largest US fleet in the region in decades.
Mexico’s president is over here begging the United Nations to show up and maybe prevent a full-scale shooting war, while the UN does its best impression of a screensaver. So we’ve got anonymous US officials leaking details of an "ongoing military operation," a president threatening war to "get our oil back," and a de facto unilateral blockade in international waters. But sure, tell us again how this is all about "stopping drugs" and "freedom" and not just 21st-century gunboat diplomacy with a spray-tan.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
netanyahu brings war menu to mar-a-lago, chef recommends midnight hammer
Tehran billboard: "For a better Iran, its missile is on me"—which pairs nicely with Mar-a-Lago’s unofficial slogan, "For a better poll number, your war is on us."
Benjamin Netanyahu is heading to Mar-a-Lago to brief Donald Trump on fresh options for bombing Iran, because nothing says responsible statecraft like planning new airstrikes at a golf resort that also sells wedding packages. Israel wants Trump to sign off on, assist with, or just outright own another round of attacks on Iran’s ballistic missile program and air defenses, on top of June’s U.S.-led Operation Midnight Hammer — the one Trump insists "totally obliterated" Iran’s nuclear capabilities while U.S. assessments quietly say, "lol, not quite."
While Tehran is publicly floating the idea of resuming talks, Trump is privately being handed a familiar four-course war menu: Israel goes solo, Israel with U.S. backup, joint strikes, or the full "America does it all" special. At the same time, he’s considering military strikes in Venezuela, boasting on TV that he’s "destroyed the Iran nuclear threat and ended the war in Gaza, bringing, for the first time in 3,000 years, peace to the Middle East" — which is a bold claim, especially for a region that is currently being managed via ceasefires, proxy wars, and PowerPoint target lists on the Oval Office coffee table.
The White House is still thumping its chest about bunker-busting Iran’s enrichment sites, Israel is demanding more action before Iran rebuilds its missile and air defense infrastructure, and Trump is threatening to "obliterate" anything Tehran reconstructs unless they come back to the table on his terms. In other words, U.S. foreign policy is now a protection racket: nice ballistic program you’re trying to rebuild there, shame if something happened to it. But sure, tell yourself this is about "regional stability" and not about a president auditioning for Strongman of the Year while dangling new wars over two continents.
#imperialism#national-security#killing-democracy
nothing says ‘no new wars’ like maybe invading venezuela
Trump explaining how tariffs, magic beans, and maybe a little war with Venezuela will somehow pay for everything, if you just don’t look at the budget math too closely.
Trump sat down with Kristen Welker and, in classic fashion, used the opportunity to threaten another foreign country, lie about health care, and mangle basic math on tariffs — so, you know, presidential.
First up, Venezuela: the guy who ran on ending forever wars now says he “doesn’t rule out” war with Caracas and has ordered a “blockade” on Venezuelan oil tankers. He won’t say if regime change is the goal, just that Nicolás Maduro “knows exactly what I want.” Because nothing says ‘peace president’ like openly dangling invasion while choking a foreign economy.
On health care, Trump claims his big national address already unveiled his master plan: just give people money and let them “buy their own health insurance” with various “health care accounts.” No details, no structure, no numbers — just vibes and buzzwords. He also insists he doesn’t need to repeal Obamacare because it will “repeal itself,” which is a bold new legal theory where laws vanish if Trump says they’re unpopular on TV.
Then there are tariffs, which Trump now declares will be “permanent” because they supposedly give the U.S. “great national security” and “tremendous wealth.” He even says they’ll pay for his new “warrior dividend” for service members. Tiny problem: a senior administration official and a Senate appropriations source say the money is actually coming from military housing funds, not tariff revenue. In other words, troops get a bonus while their barracks crumble, and the White House calls it a win — but sure, tell me more about how tariffs are writing the checks.
#imperialism#killing-democracy#full-stupid
trump discovers syria still exists, sends more bombs
US warplanes over Syria, bravely defending the principle that Congress never has to vote on war again.
The US has launched large-scale airstrikes across central Syria, because nothing says "careful, measured response" like dropping a bunch of bombs in a country we never officially declared war on. Two US soldiers and a civilian interpreter were killed in Palmyra, and in true forever-war fashion, the answer is apparently more of the same: a bigger strike package, more targets, and still no coherent strategy beyond "hit back and hope it looks tough on TV".
According to anonymous officials (the only truly permanent branch of government at this point), the strikes hit "dozens" of Islamic State targets, as part of the ongoing US-led campaign that has somehow become a semi-permanent occupation without Congress ever bothering to do its job. In other words, the Trump administration is still running on the same dusty 2001 and 2002 AUMFs like they’re an all-you-can-bomb buffet, because why ask for updated authorization when you can just keep pretending the war on terror is a single, unending episode?
The US is now routinely coordinating with Syria’s own security forces in these operations, which is a fun little reminder that American foreign policy has fully entered the "everyone’s awful, but we brought the jets" phase. But sure, tell us again how this is all about "precision" and "deterrence" and not about a president flexing military power whenever he needs a ratings bump or a distraction from whatever scandal is currently on fire back home.
#imperialism#national-security
trump quietly signs $901,000,000,000 participation trophy for the pentagon
Donald Trump signs away $901 billion to the Pentagon in a low-key ceremony, proving you don’t need a photo op when the real audience is Lockheed Martin’s stock chart.
Donald Trump just signed a nearly $1 trillion defense bill and did it with all the fanfare of a mobster signing a plumbing invoice. The 2026 NDAA hands the Pentagon a record $901bn—more than Trump even asked for—because nothing says "fiscal conservatism" like shoveling an extra $8bn at the military and then pretending to care about the deficit when someone wants school lunches. There was no big signing ceremony, no cameras, just a quiet White House notice that the money cannon is locked and loaded.
Congress—run by Republicans, mind you—forced in things Trump actually hates, like supporting NATO and Ukraine. The bill gives $800m to Ukraine over two years, money that conveniently goes straight to US weapons manufacturers, plus $175m for the Baltics, and it literally bars Trump from slashing US troop levels in Europe below 76,000 or giving up the NATO supreme commander title. In other words, Congress wrote "we know you love Putin" into law and then bubble-wrapped Europe against Trump’s next brainwave.
So why did he sign it? Because the same bill also hard-codes his pet obsessions into law: funding his "Golden Dome" missile defense vanity project and eliminating diversity, equity and inclusion programs at the Pentagon. The price of keeping US troops in Europe is apparently letting Trump turn the Defense Department into Fox News with nukes. Congress basically said, "Fine, we’ll protect NATO, you can kill DEI and name your missile shield like it’s a casino." The result is a bipartisan masterpiece where the US buys more weapons, undermines inclusion in its own military, and locks in Trump-era policy for years—because nothing screams "strong democracy" like quietly baking authoritarian culture-war garbage into a trillion-dollar war budget.
This all comes from the same guy who vetoed the NDAA in 2020 because it dared to rename Confederate bases and wouldn’t help him punish tech companies. Back then, Congress overrode him. Now they’ve learned: don’t fight him, just bribe him with a golden missile dome and some anti-woke red meat, and he’ll sign anything. The empire keeps expanding, the contractors keep cashing in, and the only thing being "reined in" is diversity training.
#imperialism#forever-grifting
trump ends 'forever wars' by starting a cute little one off venezuela
Trump explains that this is absolutely not a new war, just a "total and complete" blockade with bonus missile strikes, so it totally doesn’t count.
Trump ran on “no new wars” and is now racking up at least 26 boat strikes, nearly 100 dead, a double-tap strike under congressional scrutiny, the seizure of an oil tanker, and a "total and complete blockade" of sanctioned Venezuelan oil tankers — but don’t worry, it’s not a war, it’s just peace with explosives. The White House insists this is all about "narcoterrorism" and fulfilling campaign promises on drugs, because nothing says "America First" like turning the Caribbean into a live-fire zone to enforce an economic chokehold.
MAGA world, which supposedly hates foreign entanglements, is apparently fine with undeclared military campaigns so long as the targets are "drug boats" and the dead people aren’t American. As one friendly think tanker helpfully explains, you can run "wild and crazy foreign policies" as long as the costs stay low — meaning low for U.S. domestic politics, not for the civilians caught between sanctions, blockades, and missile strikes. The administration is dusting off the Monroe Doctrine, rebranding it as an anti-cartel crusade, and betting the base won’t notice that "ending forever wars" has quietly morphed into forever gunboat diplomacy.
The right is now having a very serious discussion about whether regime change in Venezuela would be a bridge too far, not because killing people and blockading a country might be wrong, but because it might finally pierce the illusion that Trump is some kind of anti-interventionist dove. For now, he gets to posture as both the tough Monroe Doctrine enforcer and the guy who "doesn’t want a protracted war" — a Schrödinger’s warmonger whose bombs are apparently exempt from the "no new wars" promise as long as they’re dropped in the name of fighting drugs.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump’s miami peace summit: let’s give putin his money back
European leaders stare at a spreadsheet of frozen Russian billions while somewhere in Miami, Trump is trying to staple a surrender flag to a wire transfer form.
Donald Trump has discovered a bold new strategy for peace: pay the guy who started the war. While the EU agonizes over how to legally tap £184bn in frozen Russian assets to keep Ukraine from collapsing, Trump is furiously demanding those assets be unfrozen so they can anchor his pro-Russian "peace" plan. Because nothing says "deterrence" like rewarding an illegal invasion with a giant wire transfer.
As Brussels tries to thread the needle between law, markets, and the small matter of not letting Russia bulldoze a European democracy, "US and Russian negotiators" are lining up for talks in Miami—apparently now the Geneva of post-truth geopolitics. The EU is wrestling with how to turn Kremlin cash into a loan mechanism for Kyiv; Trump’s proposal is simpler: hand Moscow its money back and call it statesmanship. In other words, Europe debates reparations while Trump auditions to be Putin’s collections agent.
The article politely worries about Pandora’s box, bond markets, and future precedents for places like Taiwan. Meanwhile, the more immediate precedent is that a former (and possibly future) U.S. president is openly siding with the aggressor’s balance sheet against the victim’s survival. But sure, tell us again how this is all about "peace" and not about doing one more giant favor for the guy who helped break Western democracy the first time.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump discovers taiwan is made of money and missiles
Donald Trump solemnly explains absolutely nothing about a $10+ billion arms dump to Taiwan while the real speech is happening on Pentagon invoices.
The Trump administration just announced more than $10 billion in arms sales to Taiwan — HIMARS, ATACMS, howitzers, drones, software, missiles, spare parts, and refurbishment kits, because nothing says "regional stability" like turning an island into a Lockheed showroom. The deals were rolled out during a nationally televised Trump address in which he barely mentioned foreign policy at all, let alone China or Taiwan, because why explain your escalatory arms bazaar when you can just let State drop the receipts after the cameras turn off?
The State Department dutifully recited the usual boilerplate that the sales serve "U.S. national, economic, and security interests" — and there it is, the one honest word: economic. Trump and the Pentagon reportedly pushed Taiwan to spend up to 10% of its GDP on defense — far above what the U.S. or its major allies spend — while Taiwan's government scrambles toward 3.3% next year and 5% by 2030, plus a special $40 billion budget for its "Taiwan Dome" air defense project. In other words, Washington is "helping" Taiwan defend itself the same way a loan shark "helps" you with your finances.
Taiwanese leaders are publicly grateful, talking about deterrence and peace, because what else do you say when the world's biggest arms dealer is also your only plausible security guarantor? Meanwhile, China is guaranteed to be furious, tensions go up another notch, and U.S. defense contractors get another few billion reasons to love Trump's second term. But sure, this is all about "maintaining political stability" and not, say, turning the Taiwan Strait into a forever revenue stream.
#imperialism#money#national-security
trump’s narco-top gun: blowing up boats for regime change
US warship calmly patrolling international waters, heroically enforcing the president’s new foreign policy doctrine: ‘keep blowing stuff up until the other guy quits.’
Defense secretary Pete Hegseth hopped on Twitter/X to announce that Joint Task Force "Southern Spear" carried out yet another "lethal kinetic strike" in the eastern Pacific, killing four alleged "narco-terrorists" on a vessel in international waters. No names, no independent evidence, no video – just trust the guy whose boss thinks the laws of war are more like suggestions.
The strike comes as Donald Trump proudly unveiled a blockade of all sanctioned oil tankers entering and leaving Venezuela, accusing Caracas of using oil to fund drug trafficking. Because nothing says "defending the homeland" like unilaterally trying to choke off another country's economy on the high seas while lobbing missiles at boats along "known narco-trafficking routes".
Since 2 September, the Pentagon admits to more than 20 such strikes, killing at least 99 people, mostly off Venezuela’s coast. The administration is under pressure to release video of a particularly controversial 2 September attack, but Hegseth has simply refused – and the White House insists everything is perfectly legal, just in case you were worried this looked like a secretive undeclared war built on vibes and PowerPoints.
And in case anyone was still pretending this was about drugs and not old-school regime change, Trump’s chief of staff Susie Wiles told Vanity Fair that Trump “wants to keep on blowing boats up until Maduro cries uncle.” In other words, it’s not a counternarcotics operation, it’s a floating coup attempt – a live-fire foreign policy tantrum masquerading as law enforcement, but sure, totally within the bounds of lawful warfare.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
trump discovers ‘dignity’ setting for 20 minutes at dover
Trump stands solemnly at Dover, honoring the casualties of a war he keeps declaring over but somehow never manages to stop.
Donald Trump showed up at Dover Air Force Base for a dignified transfer of two US National Guard members and a US civilian interpreter killed in Syria, briefly pausing his usual programming of rage-posts and victimhood to stand in silence for cameras. Sgt. Edgar Brian Torres-Tovar, 25, Sgt. William Nathaniel Howard, 29, and interpreter Ayad Mansoor Sakat were ambushed and killed by an Islamic State gunman — a threat Trump once bragged he had “100% defeated” with the same confidence he used to talk about COVID tests and Sharpie weather maps.
Three other US service members were wounded, and Syrian personnel were also injured, because the forever-war Trump promised to end somehow keeps producing dead Americans and grieving families. But sure, let’s frame this as a moment of presidential gravitas instead of the inevitable outcome of years of chaotic, whiplash Syria policy that swung between “pull out now” and “take the oil”. Nothing says “support the troops” like sending them into the same endless conflict you keep pretending is over, then showing up at Dover for the photo op.
#imperialism#killing-democracy
congress funds the empire, throws a pronoun at the base
Congress proudly announces it has once again funded the forever wars and bravely protected America from cadet track meets.
Congress just passed a record $901bn Pentagon bill, because nothing says fiscal responsibility like shoveling nearly a trillion dollars into the war machine while pretending we can’t afford healthcare or housing. The 2026 NDAA gives troops a 4% raise and defense contractors a 400% grin, and Trump has already promised to sign it, because if there’s one thing this guy never vetoes, it’s more money for bombs and toys.
In a rare act of spine-adjacent behavior, Republicans actually defied Trump’s Russia-friendly “national security strategy” and slipped in actual support for Europe and Ukraine: $800m for Ukraine over two years, $175m for the Baltics, a floor of 76,000 US troops in Europe, and a “you can’t give away NATO supreme commander” rule, because apparently we now have to legislate against the president just handing Putin the keys to the alliance.
But don’t worry, the GOP still made time for the real priority: culture war cosplay. The bill doesn’t rename the Pentagon as Trump’s dream “Department of War” – which, to be fair, would at least be honest – but it does manage to ban transgender women from women’s sports at military academies. No universal background checks, no serious helicopter safety reforms after a crash that killed 67 people, but sure, let’s legislate which cadet can run track. In other words: a bipartisan agreement that the American empire must be endlessly funded, and the only thing that really needs regulating is other people’s existence.
#imperialism#full-stupid
world’s greatest dealmaker discovers ‘piracy’ is cheaper than diplomacy
US warships cruising the Caribbean to confiscate other people’s oil, because apparently colonialism just needed better branding and a Twitter account.
Trump has ordered a “total and complete” blockade of all sanctioned oil tankers entering or leaving Venezuela, because nothing says defending democracy like unilaterally choking a country’s oil exports with warships and calling it freedom. The administration has already launched more than two dozen military strikes on vessels in the Caribbean and Pacific, killing dozens of people, but sure, tell us more about how the real threat to peace is student protesters and pronouns.
Last week, US forces literally seized a tanker carrying around 2 million barrels of Venezuelan crude, which Caracas has accurately described as “blatant theft” and “an act of international piracy”. In other words, Trump looked at centuries of imperial gunboat diplomacy and said, “hold my Diet Coke.” Now he’s bragging on social media that “Venezuela is completely surrounded by the largest Armada ever assembled in the History of South America,” which is both historically illiterate and a confession of an undeclared naval war, but that’s just called Tuesday in this administration.
The White House line is that this is all about stopping “drug trafficking and other crimes,” which is a bold claim from a guy whose inner circle treats indictments like loyalty badges and whose business history reads like a RICO case study. What it actually looks like is using the US military as a collection agency and regime-change hobby shop, while daring anyone to say the word “blockade” out loud and remember that under international law it’s functionally an act of war. But hey, if you slap the word “sanctions” on it and shout “Maduro bad” enough times, apparently you can launder outright piracy into bipartisan foreign policy.
So we’ve got escalating strikes, dead sailors, seized oil, and a president live-tweeting his own Tom Clancy fanfic as official doctrine. The pundit class will call this a “strong stance” and a “foreign policy win.” History is going to call it what it is: imperial cosplay with real body counts.
#imperialism#national-security
oil blockade diplomacy: now with extra aircraft carriers
US warships crowding the Caribbean, bravely defending freedom by hovering next to Venezuela’s oil like a heavily armed raccoon at an open dumpster.
Trump has discovered a bold new form of "diplomacy": parking the world’s largest aircraft carrier off Venezuela and announcing a "total and complete" oil blockade on Truth Social with absolutely zero details on how any of this works in, you know, actual law or policy. Thousands of US troops and nearly a dozen warships are now loitering north of Venezuela because nothing says "respect for sovereignty" like threatening to choke off another country’s main source of income at gunpoint.
Venezuela, shockingly not thrilled about being economically strangled under the shadow of an armada, is calling the order an "irrational military blockade" and a "grotesque threat" aimed at stealing the country’s wealth. In other words, they’ve read the Monroe Doctrine, the Iraq War coverage, and Exxon’s annual report. Trump is bragging that Venezuela is "completely surrounded" by the "largest Armada ever assembled in the History of South America", which is both historically dubious and perfectly on brand for a guy who thinks foreign policy is a Call of Duty map.
Markets, meanwhile, are doing what they do best: profiting off looming disaster. Oil prices popped 2% on the news, because nothing says "stable global order" like a president using the US Navy as a personal collection agency while the world holds its breath and hedge funds cash in. But sure, tell us again how this isn’t naked imperialism, just America "defending democracy" by threatening to starve a country until it hands over the keys to the oil fields.
#imperialism#national-security
pentagon invents ‘secret movie night’ to dodge accountability
Members of Congress head into a secure room to watch the latest episode of ‘America’s Undeclared Wars,’ now streaming exclusively on Classified+.
Nothing says "transparent democracy" like a Pentagon snuff film that's only available in the classified VIP lounge. Members of the House and Senate Armed Services committees are being treated to a private screening of the full video of a controversial U.S. boat strike — the one Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth has decided the American public is not allowed to see. In other words, it's accountability, but make it exclusive: if you don't have clearance or a seat on the right committee, you just get rumors and press releases.
Hegseth's move is the classic Washington two-step: we'll totally show the truth, just not to the people who actually need to know it. Lawmakers get to watch the footage, posture in front of cameras afterward, and then shrug and say, "Sorry, it's classified" when anyone asks what actually happened on the water. Because nothing screams "land of the free" like a government that reserves the right to kill people on camera and then lock the tape in a vault.
But sure, this is all about "national security" and not about avoiding another round of ugly headlines, international law questions, or minor inconveniences like war crimes allegations. The Pentagon gets secrecy, Congress gets plausible deniability, and the public gets... trust us, bro.
#imperialism#national-security
